Last night I had the opportunity to catch up with one of my favorites, my twin Corey. We are non-biological twins who have shared insight, love for sports, and other notions of foolery since our Undergraduate college years. From time to time, life will throw us a preserve and allow for hours of banter. Last night was not the exception.
On our way to a sporting event, we struck up a conversation on relationships. One of our common topics of recent is patterns. Corey spoke up about being contacted by a nice young lady online who showed potential interest. After creating an open atmosphere for possibly meeting, things took a left turn unexpectantly. Long story short with no details to protect someone’s dignity, the young lady in question began putting digs on my friend’s time.
Let me flesh this out a little so I can get to the point. I love the saying: “You will make time for what you want.” Tis true! However, those of us who are nearing the middle ages of life or shying away from our twenties ever so fastly are aware of time constraints. Sometimes it is simply not 1, 2, 3 easy to connect with people whom we find interest. Enters the need for patience. I call it grace. I have the firm belief that if something is meant to be and all parties want it to be, then it will be.
Unfortunately, my friend Corey ended up with the short end of the stick. The young lady mistook his inability to connect immediately as an indicator for disinterest. Days later he became the topic of online twitter banter. Do cringe with me, this is not the move for ‘grown folks.’
In reality, those who jet-set are on the move. We have commitments in our places of worship, with family, and with civic organizations (even hobbies). We do not have conflicting schedules out of malice. But, let time and grace tell the story before jumping to conclusions. The young lady was not aware that the conflict in time was only momentary because of a community event Corey was planning for those less fortunate. The event was on a grand scale and the center of his attention for one week. The next week, his schedule returned to normal.
But that’s water under the bridge similar to the likelihood of them ever having a friendship or a match.
I’m writing about this because as we all continue to strive for wellness, peace, and good mental health we must be mindful of our attitudes and actions. Attitudes dictate actions. Attitudes are born from thoughts. Our thoughts can cost us great opportunities in life (careers, relationships, wealth, etc).
I heard a sermon a month ago that mentioned that “You might not have what you should because your personality keeps stepping in the way.” That is truth. Look closer folks, you may just see in the mirror what keeps you at home instead of on a date, in a business opportunity, in a career transition, or even at peace.
Watch those thoughts. Stop jumping to conclusions. Careful with those irrational thoughts. Learn to use a little cognitive behavior or rational thinking to dispel those ego moments of frailty. Otherwise, the costs are great.
enoughfortodaysjourney 