Plans

Wow, plans change. Life is really that simple. I remember one of my besties, actually my twin telling me moons ago that I get bent out of shape when my plans fall through. I remember it like yesterday, disputing that truth. Resistance, is typically the first sign of something holding at least a grain of merit.

Over the years, I have come to realize that my plans are truly not HIS God’s plans. Never in a million years would I look on a map and find a city in the mid-west to call my new home or adventure at least. Yet, here I stand in the heart of a metropolis over 500 miles from the state I know as my home.

I’ve been meaning to write this post for three weeks now, but I think life and the Lord needed me to add a few more vegetables to what has sized up to be a great meal. When a person arrives, they grow to be okay with uncertainty. When a person arrives, they put aside the familiar and try something new. Life does not have to go the way it was envisioned nor does it have to feel comfortable as hoped.

Two weeks ago, I re-read a card that I looked at yet again from my Sis Ericka. She quoted someone worthy and I want to share that with you. I found this blessing prayer as I stood boldly in the apartment of my new city with no certainty of tomorrow. My heart found peace after reading this.

Blessing prayer by Susie Larson

“Start a Day Blessing: May God give you a sense of what He’s up to in your life. May you see glimpses of the breakthrough that’s just up ahead. May you-with all your heart-believe that trusting Him over what your eyes see, is totally and completely worth it. May you shift your weight off of your logical reasonings and onto the weightiness of His powerful promises to you. You’ve got help and resources that go far beyond anything you could ever need. Smile with joy and walk by faith today. He’s got you.”

More Bags

“OOOOOOO Wow,” my Mother exclaimed as she basked in the view of my, freshly retrieved from my former storage unit, array of bags. Suitcases to gym bags to University swag bags, to colorful grocery eco-friendly bags gathered together in unity around one of the bedrooms of her home. I would like to believe there were on the cusp of singing we shall overcome as I unpacked them one by one, shifting my belongings into vacuum seal bags.

I never saw the room that way and actually found myself tilting my head to behold the same view that my Mother expressed. It was true. I couldn’t help but perk up and smile as I saw a wealth of experiences and journeys enveloping my being in that room. I was able to see each trip I took to Miami to visit Ailin and family. I saw the many Universities I worked with and the moments of connecting with others on both similarities and differences. I also saw the invaluable experiences gained through personal experiences from my 20’s & 30’s.

A feeling of relief entered my heart. I am currently embarking on a healthy, holistic journey. In the past, if I mentioned bags-it had more to do with where I had been and issues unresolved. Now, as I look at the bags surrounding me, my eyes are anew with appreciation for purposeful steps I am taking towards the life I want to live. I am no longer, running from what scares or shares my being.

Yes, my Mother is right. The bags in that room are amazing and I deserve to be awestruck in their beauty as well as wonder. For those bags hold memories of my life’s work, passion, purpose, and promise.